A whinny mom?

Assalam alaikum & Peace to all

I feel like whining a bit...am I allowed? Well, yeah, this is my blog so yeah I am going to HAHA!

Just lately I've been feeling overwhelmed with taking care of my one year old and kind of feel like nobody ever says what its going to be like.  Mostly I'm struggling with the fact that he is not sleeping through the night and on top of that he only falls asleep in my arms (yeah I know that is my fault and I am not blaming anyone except myself for that). I probably shouldn't really be worrying so much and stressing about it....thank God my child is healthy and safe ...so why am I stressing?  I try to think of this all when he is screaming in my face!

I don't know it's just lately I am feeling like a bad mom.  Of all the forums, boards, or any other social site, I never hear the 'real' story of how mom's act when their children scream in their face, or won't sleep for hours, etc. I mean I get so frustrated and just want it to stop.  I do scream across the room at my son (see bad mom!) to be quiet....although I realize he is too young to know why I am screaming and also I see how ridiculous it is to be saying to him in a screaming tone, "stop screaming".  I don't know why women don't really reveal their true feelings about things...or are they and am I really the only one to be feeling like this?

I read about women who have two, three, or more children and think..."why can't I just handle one, why am I getting so frustrated, so easily?"  I don't know maybe I'm just too whinny...I have been accused of that before!

The lack of sleep, the lack of a 'life' outside of my child, no babysitters so that hubby and I can have a few moments to ourselves. I feel like I am a bit getting lost in all of this.  I really don't think I'm officially depressed...I've looked it up online and I don't cry and feel bad all day.  Just sometimes feel I can't go on...but then my son looks at me and smiles and I instantly melt and know why I'm doing all this!

So, anyway this is just a rant a bit and a venting session.  I am asking if there are any mom's out there to share their stories of frustrations. If you don't want to reveal them in public just post that in the message and I won't publish it just read it.  I think I need to know that I am not losing my mind and that this is all a normal way of feeing?

Thanks for reading!

What about mom crying-it-out?

Assalam alaikum & Peace to all

Nobody really tells you what it is like to have a child and raise them...I think it's because people think that you will get scared and not even attempt to have a child!  Well, I'm not like that...I kind of like to know what I'm getting into...good and bad!  I actually get a sense of relief and satisfaction when mom's tell me that it is not easy, that it is a trial and they are sometimes frustrated - makes me feel like I'm not a total failure as a mom! Anyway my long rant here is actually going to be about some advice ....my needing advice!

Somehow I got my son used to sleeping in my arms, even for naps.  I truly don't know how it happened? I admit that in the beginning it was nice to hold him and watch him sleep...so adorable.  Ok, now that he is one years old...its getting a bit tough.  He will not sleep in his crib until he falls asleep in my arms, even for his two naps. I've tried the cry-it-out method...well a bit...I've never been able to completely have him cry for like an hour!  I actually asked the doctor yesterday at his 1 yr appointment, about the sleeping issues...she said that I should just let him cry and he will eventually get sleepy and sleep.  Well, yes but how do you do that? I mean hearing your child crying is heartbreaking (but so is holding him in my arms for over half an hour to get him to sleep) and then he just looks at me like: "don't you like me anymore?"  Aggg!
So, I'm kind of asking for some help from some mom's out there...what's the best way to get him to sleep
on his own?  Oh and he wakes up at least two times a night crying and usually ends up in my arms and bed.  Yeah I know...not good!  So HELP !!

You raised kids...I would expect more help?

Assalam alaikum & Peace to all

This is somewhat of a rant and question all in one.  When I was pregnant I was expecting a lot of advice and help from my Mother.  I imagined that she would tell me all about the late night feedings and how you would have to be awake every hour and that most likely you will be a zombie the next day.  I imagined she would tell me about how and what to feed, tell me that breastfeeding is a wonderful choice and praise me for trying to do it (she was not able to do it).  I imagined all these things and more...but what did I get...nothing really.  All I ever heard from her was that parenting was hard but worth it in the end.  Ok, well yeah we all know that...I wasn't looking for a fortune cookie message...I was looking for advice and help.  One moment I will never forget and it hurt deeply.  I was struggling with breastfeeding and little one was crying and fussing, my mother was there and she was watching what I was doing, and she says:  "stop torturing him and give him a bottle" OMG...I was so hurt...I just looked at her and said : "I'm not torturing, I'm trying to feed"  I mean really...how could she say that?  Anyway, basically I was looking for some motherly advice but it never came, only "fortune-cookie" sayings. Sigh...anyway I'm mostly over it now (mostly, not quite).  So jump forward to today...present time. Little one is a bit sick or teething, don't really know yet if its a cold or just teething.  He is a bit feverish, and is sneezing a bit more, and just doesn't look happy.  I know, I know it sounds like a cold, but two months ago he was the same and out popped two teeth, so I realized it was that.  Right now he is working on all four of his upper teeth, so I'm assuming its from that, anyway this time its Mother -In -Law who is questioning things.  She says: "how did he get a fever, why is this happening?  SERIOUSLY?? I felt like saying to her "you raised two kids, you know they get fevers, and go through teething."  Why are these mothers not helping? Instead they are questioning and acting as if they don't know what babies and kids go through?? Maybe I'm expecting too much?  I'm not sure what I would do if there was no internet, I would surely be stuck on what to do and what to expect.  If I'm allowed to be a grandmother one day (Inshallah) I swear that son or daughter or son-in-law/daughter-in-law will get an ear full of me giving examples and advice and all...well, if only they want it...I also know when to SHUT UP! LOL!!